


Trick or Treat

by bboiseux



Series: Critical Role Campaign 1 [13]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Bisexual Female Character, Excessive Drinking, F/F, F/M, First Kiss, Halloween, Halloween Costumes, Implied Compulsory Heterosexuality, Light Angst, Mostly Fluff, Open Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-28
Updated: 2019-10-28
Packaged: 2021-01-05 03:04:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21206363
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bboiseux/pseuds/bboiseux
Summary: Vex has the perfect plan to get Vax and Keyleth to act on their mutual crushes: she'll get Keyleth to dress as Poison Ivy!  Maybe such a skimpy outfit will be the little push Vax needs to finally make a move.Or, maybe, Vex is mistaken about who Keyleth is interested in ....Reading Time:17 mins





	Trick or Treat

“This is silly,” said Keyleth, her voice slightly muffled by the bathroom door. There was a ceramic thud (Keyleth stumbling and slamming down on the porcelain goddess, Vex imagined) and a frustrated grunt. “I can’t believe I let you talk me into this!” came the exasperated shout.

Not too far from the bathroom, Vex was stretched out on the couch, playing with the zipper on the PVC jumpsuit she’d squeezed herself into. It hugged every curve and she was imagining the looks she’d be getting at Gilmore’s. Percy would be there, but they could be … complicated together. The zipper ran down to her navel with a pleasant zip! and then back up to her neck with just as pleasant a zip! Ah, but Jarett might be there. Zip! Down to the navel. Vex considered the view. Laying at this angle, the pushup bra wasn’t doing much of anything—it was mostly gravity. But, she thought, there was no point in dressing like Catwoman if you weren’t going to make your tits put on a show. Zip!

“You’re going to look delightful, my darling Poison Ivy,” she yelled in Keyleth’s general direction.

There was another thud, a bit louder this time, and an even more frustrated groan. A little later, Keyleth yelled, “This stupid thing is in my butt!”

Vex smiled, her lips scarlet, and stopped playing with the zipper. “Do you need a helping hand?” Her teasing look was wasted on the bathroom door.

There was an unusually long silence from the other side of the door and then Keyleth said, fairly quietly, “No.” And then, as if thinking Vex hadn’t heard, she shouted, “No!”

Vex raised an eyebrow. “Alright, darling, message received loud and clear.” She grabbed her phone from the arm of the couch and took a quick peek at the screen. “It’s also past time to go!” She slid to sitting and started pulling her high heel boots on. “I don’t want to keep Vax waiting!”

The door to the bathroom swung open a little and Keyleth stuck her head out. “I—I think I’m ready.”

Well, the makeup and hair still looked good. Vex had spent an hour getting Keyleth’s hair wrapped up around those stupid Uma Thurman cones and doing a, frankly, amazing job on her eye makeup. She’d done a simple smoky eye on herself, but Keyleth? She’d gone all out on Keyleth: a bright metallic emerald that swooped out wide from the eye, multiple shades of highlights, and lush lashes. She’d be jealous if she didn’t get to enjoy the results all night. Now, about the rest of the costume ….

“Well, Keyleth dear, do I get to see all of you?”

There was a deep breath and the door swung the rest of the way.

Vex’s smile went wide.

Keyleth—demure, shy Keyleth—was wearing six-inch green heels (with craft ivy leaves tastefully applied to the top), a green leotard that just barely covered her crotch and had a translucent section running from navel to shoulders, and absolutely nothing else. The legs alone were enough to kill. Vex sucked in a breath. Keyleth was in baggy t-shirts and skirts so often that it was easy to forget that the girl had the legs (and thighs and ass) of an athlete. She was such a natural Poison Ivy … after Vex had talked Keyelth into removing all that excess body hair with a waxing. With this much skin, Vex couldn’t see how Vax could resist making a move. And, to make it even better, Vex was certain this was both a trick and a treat. He was going to hate her!

Vex fanned herself with mock abandon. “Keyleth, you’re overloading my poor bi heart!”

Pink bloomed from Keyeth’s cheeks to halfway down her chest (which Vex could very clearly see) and started wildly moving her arms and hands to cover … anything and anywhere.

Vex leaped up and grabbed Keyleth’s hands. She cocked her head and looked up (far up) into Keyleth’s face. “You look lovely,” she said, her voice shifting from mocking to calming tones, “Frankly, you’re stunning. You have nothing to worry about.”

Keyleth smiled weakly. “This thing really is stuck in my butt.”

A few pieces of double-sided clothing tape and a bus ride later and they were at Gilmore’s, the purple light of the bar spilling out onto a crowded sidewalk, the bass from the DJ thrumming through the air. Gilmore’s always threw the best holiday parties (Vex assumed it had something to do with Gilmore’s tendency to go to excess) and the whole gang had agreed to meet up for a night of reckless abandon (well, Vex intended to have a night of reckless abandon and she was hoping Keyleth’s outfit could encourage Vax to do the same).

Vex and Keyleth were only thirty minutes late by the time they figured out the wardrobe and it was easy enough to track down their friends: they just looked for Grog. Grog, seven feet tall on a bad day, bald, with a full thick beard, tended to prefer to go shirtless (given how ripped he was, Vex couldn’t blame him—not that she was interested in Grog, but she could appreciate a solid hunk of man meat). Apparently, he had decided that he should dress up as Kratos, which, as far as Vex could tell, meant he’d added a massive fake battle ax to his normal get up. As always, Pike was right by her best friend. Vex initially couldn’t make out who she was supposed to be—a plaid button up over a t-shirt and jeans didn’t scream anything—but after Pike yelled “Tell them that … Ellie is the little girl … that broke your fucking finger!” Vex got the message loud and clear. And, also as always, Scanlan was right by Pike. Apparently, he had decided a young Freddie Mercury was the exact right costume—he was decked out in a white and blue one-piece full-body leotard, cut to show his chest hair, and was wearing false teeth to give himself a massive overbite.

Not long after, Percy pushed through the crowd, multiple beer bottles balanced in his hands. When he saw Vex, he froze. Vex, on the other hand, burst into laughter. Percy was dressed in a full Batman suit, complete with rubber nipples. Best of all, he had blacked out around his eyes to complete his look … but his glasses were still perched over the cowl.

He took a deep breath and muttered, “I’m going to kill Vax.”

“Oh, is this my brother’s fault?” said Vex, as Percy began to pass around the beers, “I guess this must be my treat! You look purr-fect!” She popped up and pecked Percy on the lips. She said, only loud enough for Percy to hear, “You let me know if you need any help getting your utility belt off.” Their relationship was complicated, but fun.

After that, the night launched into high gear. Keyleth lost her self-consciousness after a few drinks and started dancing wildly. Vex spent her time warming Percy up and looking for other prospects, while the others found their own ways to entertain themselves. Eventually, Vex found herself to the bar, feeling slightly frustrated. First, she had yet to see her fuck off brother, who wasn’t answering her texts. Second, there were far too many drunk frat boys around to find any decent prospects in this crowd. While an athletic Uni boy could be a great deal of fun, Vex had decided that waking up in a dorm was no longer worth the effort. So, leaving an increasingly sloppy drunk Keyleth (right now she was on the dance floor swinging her arms wildly, stomping out a beat and whooping to the sky) with Grog and Pike and Scanlan, Vex settled in next to Percy at the bar.

She smiled at him. At some point during the night he’d peeled off the cowl, but he hadn’t had time to clean off his face. He had gray circles around his eyes and sweaty streaks of makeup down his face. He looked a godawful mess and it was adorable.

Percy took off his glasses and pulled out a clean handkerchief from a utility bely pouch and began cleaning the lenses. “It’s always quite an experience, isn’t it?”

Vex leaned back against the bar and ran her eyes around the room. “Where has that idiot brother of mine gone?” She huffed a most irritated huff. “I get Keyleth all dressed up—” She broke off and grabbed Percy by the arm and shook him (maybe she had had a little too much herself, she thought briefly). “She even waxed her legs and armpits and bush for this fucking costume. Keyleth! She’s never even shaved down there.”

Percy nodded sagely, as if they were discussing annual business reports. “I had wondered. It seemed a bit out of character.”

“She does all that. I get her in this skimpy outfit. And my fucking brother can’t even bother to show up!” The shaking of Percy intensified. “Look at those legs, Percival! Look at them! Ladders! To! Heaven!”

Percy finally managed to finish up with his lenses and put them back on his face. He gave Vex a long look and seemed to reach some kind of decision. “I actually saw your brother earlier.”

“Did he happen to mention why he was ditching us?”

“Ah, well, he didn’t tell me in so many words, no.”

“Fucker.” Vex frowned and nursed at her bottle. Keyleth’s arm was draped around some dude in a … Chippendales Spongebob costume? She squinted to confirm what she was seeing (god, Keyleth was too good looking for her own good) and then turned back to Percy. She nudged him with her shoulder. “Okay, spill. You’ve got your ‘bad news’ face on.”

Percy did his version of a pout, which was to raise his eyebrows high to look as arrogant as possible. “I firmly deny that I have a ‘bad news’ face.”

The beer bottle was back at Vex’s lips and she smiled a moment before she drank.

“But, if I did have bad news, regardless of my face, it would be that your brother and Gilmore were, not too long ago, making out in a back corner.”

From Percy’s face (he really was so delightfully easy to read), he had been expecting an explosion, but Vex simply sighed. “God damn it, Vax. He told me there was nothing going on. He told me that it was too complicated.”

“Well, apparently, they figured it out.”

Vex scowled.

“Anyway,” continued Percy, “I’m not sure why you’re so intent on pushing Keyleth and Vax together. You used to be dead set against them.”

“I thought I was being nice!” Vex swiveled on the stool, dropping her beer on the bar. “I thought Vax would appreciate the help! Might get his thoughts off everything else! I thought maybe it would give Keyleth someone to talk to!” She rested her head on Percy’s shoulder. “She doesn’t talk as much as she should. I never know what’s bothering her. And then she goes out and drinks like this and …. I don’t know, Percy. I guess I went a little overboard.”

Vex tilted her head to look up at Percy. She’d had more than enough time with him to know when the gears were grinding in his head.

Vex gave Percy’s side a sharp poke (necessary, she told herself, for him to feel it through that absurd rubber). “Careful, dear. If I can’t find another willing partner, I’m going to need that big beautiful brain of yours to keep me company.”

The glimmer of a smile spread on Percy’s face and Vex felt a nice warmth spread inside.

“Far be it for me to ruin your fun …”

Vex grinned. “That’s right, think about my fun. Although …” Her smile went wicked. “… Now I’m thinking about what I could do to you ….”

“… that said,” continued Percy.

“Oh dear.” Vex lifted her head from Percy’s shoulder and raised a sardonic eyebrow in his general direction.

“While I’m not usually one to stick my nose where it doesn’t belong …”

Vex swallowed her laugh, which resulted in an unfortunate snort. At this moment she was glad for the rumble of the bass. For all that Vex loved to tease Percy, she was thankful that this time he didn't seem to notice.

"... but has Keyleth ever actually kissed a man?"  
  
Vex rolled her eyes. "I think we all remember her absolute meltdown after Kash kissed her."  
  
"Ah, yes. Perhaps I should put it another way. Kash kissed her, but has Keyleth--" Percy cleared his throat. "--expressed any desire, on her part, to kiss a man?"  
  
"She was pink for practically a week going on and on about that kiss, Percival dear."

“While there is a part of me that would prefer not to point this out, as there is nothing I would like more than to share my bed with you tonight, I do feel that there is a rather significant detail that you have somehow overlooked.” Percy began to muse. “I’d rather suspected it for a while, but you’ve given a rather big clue tonight and you don’t even seem to realize its importance.”

Vex shot Percy a look of sarcasm laced with confusion. “Well, darling, please don’t let me stop you from laying out your revelatory detail.”

Percy turned to face Vex. “It’s the curious fact that Keyleth chose to remove an inordinate amount of hair in a very painful way solely because you, Vex, suggested she should.”

Vex waggled a finger in Percy’s face. “Which goes to show her interest in Vax.”

“Did she say that’s why she was doing this little performance?”

“No, but it’s obvious. That’s the whole point of the costume”

“And whose idea was that?”

“Mine, but Vax has been interested in her for so long that I thought—”

Percy clamped his hands on Vex’s shoulders and Vex’s mouth snapped shut. Her body went stiff. Percy wasn’t usually this forward.

”Vex,” he said, “Keyleth did all of that for you. You.”

Vex felt her stomach go all strange and she bristled at Percy’s words. “Percival, if you’d like to make a point, just make it.”

Percy let go of Vex and readjusted his glasses. While, granted, Percy usually had a serious face on, he was being extra careful to keep it on now. “I may be incorrect, but it seems fairly clear that Keyleth isn’t interested in your brother. She’s interested in you.”

Vex opened her mouth to argue, but then the dancing figure of Keyleth caught her eye. Vex and Keyleth had been friends for so long and Keyleth had always been the awkward, shy companion to Vex’s affected charm. Vex hadn’t even liked Keyleth in the beginning, prickling at her lack of self-esteem, her harsh judgments on herself. But Keyleth was kind and caring. She would do anything for her friends, no matter how much stress and pain it caused her. She had been there after the car accident—everyday with homemade food and freshly picked flowers. And she had never asked Vex for anything in return. And, in return, Vex had never for a moment considered Keyleth’s feelings. She’d even dressed her up in a skimpy outfit, convinced her to do things she would never do, and—knowing how Keyleth was with alcohol—dragged her to a party and left her with a bunch of strangers (left her with Pike and Grog said the part of Vex that was kind). All because she was pushing her friend at her brother (because you were thinking of your brother, said that part of Vex again). What a dirty trick to play on a friend.

Vex abruptly stood up and gave Percy a sickly smile and a peck on the cheek. “Thank you, darling. I think I have to go make things right.”

Percy simply nodded and said, “Good luck.”

A few pushes and a nice shove got Vex to Keyleth and her guardians. At some point in the last few minutes, Pike had apparently decided enough was enough and she was trying to talk Keyleth off the dance floor—as Keyleth let some Uni jock grind up on her, a few of his friends cheering her on. Grog was about to wipe the floor with someone’s face when Vex jumped in and wrapped an arm around Keyleth’s waist, pulling her away from the scrum. A whoop went up immediately from the frat boys and a couple of them started chanting “Make out! Make out!”

“Keyleth dear,” yelled Vex, trying to be heard over the music, “It’s time to go home.”

Keyleth let out a moan of disappointment and draped herself around Vex. “But Vex I’m having so much fun! Let’s stay all night!”

Vex began leading Keyleth away from the crowd. “No, darling, you need some sleep.” She said goodbye to Pike and Grog as they saw her to the door, reassuring Pike that she’d see Keyleth home, and began the work of stumbling the block to the bus stop. The whole process was made more difficult by the fact that Keyleth, one, was much taller than Vex; two, seemed to think that her left foot and right foot were reversed (it was even worse in heels); and, three, Keyleth kept trying to nuzzle Vex’s shoulder.

Finally, five minutes and not even half a block from the bar, Vex stopped and stood Keyleth up straight. Keyleth was swaying slightly, her hair a tousled mess, her eyes droopy.

“I love you, Vex,” Keyleth said suddenly and, even though Keyleth had said it a thousand times before, especially while drunk, Vex blushed hot in the cold October air. “You’re just so … so … good!”

Vex took a deep breath and wondered whether she was going to regret this in the morning (well, said that little voice, it depends what the morning brings, doesn’t it?). After all, Keyleth had been drinking (yes, said the voice again, but when else will Keyleth tell you?). So, thoughts being the enemy, Vex reached up and pulled Keyleth to her lips.

Vex would be lying if she said she hadn’t thought of kissing Keyleth before. Keyleth was gorgeous and Vex was perfectly willing to admit her own penchant for hedonism. She wasn’t superficial, but she was capable of acting on the superficial. So, she’d imagined in passing, but never with any serious consideration.

Vex didn’t want to push (this felt like she had already pushed too far), so she restrained herself from pulling Keyleth tight, tasting her mouth with her tongue, running her hands anywhere but Keyleth’s hair. Still, Keyleth’s lips were warm and wet, sliding easily over Vex and, as soon as their lips touched, Keyleth’s hands were wandering to Vex’s face, cradling her, holding her tenderly, Keyleth’s eyes drifting shut, but her mouth gingerly massaging Vex’s top lip. In return, Vex sucked lightly at Keyleth’s bottom lip and glowed bright at the little noise that murmured from Keyleth’s throat.

The whole thing lasted maybe five, ten seconds, but, when they broke apart, Keyleth shuffled back, a sleepy satisfied smile on her face. “Mmmm. That was nice.” She threw her arms around Vex. “We should do that more often.”

Vex swallowed the urge to pull Keyleth in for more. Instead, she began guiding her down the street again. “Well, why don’t we see about that in the morning? Right now we need to get you home to water and cuddles.”

Vex didn’t know if this was a trick or a treat (only the morning could tell), but she knew which way her hopes were falling.

**Author's Note:**

> **Introduction**  
This story is part of [LLF Comment Project](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/llfcommentproject), which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. This author invites and appreciates feedback, including:
> 
> **Feedback**
> 
>   * Short comments
>   * Long comments
>   * Questions
>   * Constructive criticism - focus on descriptions
>   * “<3” as extra kudos
>   * Reader-reader interaction
> 
> [LLF Comment Builder](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/post/170952243543/now-presenting-the-llf-comment-builder-beta)   
**Author Responses**   

> 
>   * This author replies to comments.
>   * **Note:** If you don’t want a reply, for any reason, feel free to sign your comment with _whisper_. I will still appreciate the comment, but not respond. :)


End file.
